inside job
balance. stability. alignment. equilibrium. peace.
i think many of us wonder how to achieve that in our normal lives, or at least the portrayal of that in our daily rhythms…
but what does that mean? where can i find that?
if balance is the canceling of opposing forces, that sounds a lot like stagnation.
if stability means i never fall, that sounds out of the question.
if alignment requires something outside of me to be “right”, that sounds like a tricky dance.
if equilibrium sounds unperturbed, that sounds a bit boring.
so what am i even after? and can i even achieve it?
what if equilibrium and stability looks more like a swaying tree that never falls? and because of the wind has stronger wood and deeper roots...
what if forward progress actually requires a positive imbalance? a forward lean that initiates one step, to many steps...
what if falling to my knees in desperation and worship is a stronger posture than standing upright? the powerlessness may actually be the super power...
so from the outside - stability is hard to determine or define.
i’d postulate that it’s an inside job.
my balance, equilibrium, stability, peace, gratitude, drive, joy - it’s an inside job.
my base of support must be grounded under me and rooted in a strong foundation - for the external forces to be absorbed and resisted.
it’s the inside that should effect the outside, because the other way around leaves things to chance beyond my control.
and this is not to declare some toxic independence stance. it’s ultimately not me of course. the Bible says, God works in and through me - in first, then through. He is notoriously always playing the heart and mind games before the “go therefore” commissioning.
He says that Jesus died for life in abundance - that’s a now statement.
and that, in Christ, I lack no good thing.
that I’ve been given the mind of Christ, the power of the Spirit, the image of God. that’s a lot I have access to - inside.
so the inside job is finding my structural stability in those inside pieces. for the abundance within to be the source for pouring out.
the vessel is being cleaned as it pours out.
“My response is to get down on my knees before the Father, this magnificent Father who parcels out all heaven and earth. I ask him to strengthen you by his Spirit—not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength—that Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite him in. And I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you’ll be able to take in with all followers of Jesus the extravagant dimensions of Christ’s love. Reach out and experience the breadth! Test its length! Plumb the depths! Rise to the heights! Live full lives, full in the fullness of God. God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.”
- eph 3:14-21 MSG
to have outside influence - to serve, help, add value, support - i must have inside structural stability. stable structures can be refuges for others, stand up in storms, and be leaned on.
the game has changed.
abundance is in me now.
the garden is in me now.
i am loved, i am lovable, and from there, i can be loving.
it’s an inside job.
“So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever.”
- 2 corin 4:16-18 MSG