gazed, not confused
ever taken a ride on a bike, seen a pothole ahead, engaged the mental chant, “don’t hit it, don’t hit it, don—-”, only to head straight for it, clenching all muscles to be clenched, hoping to not launch over the handle bars?
no? just me...
or maybe you’ve taken a drive. long country road, perhaps some lovely scenery to take in - or rubber necking past a car accident - and notice the car drifting to the left as you gaze out the window?
where you look the body follows.
to every pothole or unintentional drift is a proverbial one. setting our mental gaze towards a target determines our direction and motivation.
there is science that can confirm our vision and eyes correlating to motivation and the dopamine system. the perception of the eyes unconsciously zones in and out according to our alertness and intensity for information in relation to our goals or targets - an adaptive survival response, yes, and also, energetic efficiency and reward system components also play a part. this “motivated perception theory” attributes our goals, targets, and motivations to influencing how we interpret visual and sensory stimuli. then those interpretations re-enter the loop affecting our affect via stress/calm balance as well as narrative script authoring and integration.
so, what do you see?
gaze creates aim, aim creates target. gaze determines direction and draw. gaze creates the compelling and then subtly, yet relentlessly draws us towards something. it puts full meaning behind “directing our gaze.” what you’re gazing at you will move towards. so set your eyes, intentionally.
this speaks to not only to directionality of my gaze but also my lens - what if I will see what I want to see? or see what i’ve been trained and shaped to see? the good and the bad versions of that. seeing the sacred in the ordinary, gratitude. or looking for fear, rejection, and disappointment because well, “we’ve been here before,” and finding it.
so, why do you see it that way?
my gaze takes a direction, operates through a lens, but also tilts to an altitude. my thoughts can be directed upward or downwards. my sights inclination can determine trajectories and destinations.
“the model we choose to use to understand something determines what we find.” - Iain McGilchrist
my labels for the places i set my gaze can also affect my approach.
label a peak or an insurmountable obstacle.
label a valley or a spacious passage.
label a challenge or an opportunity.
false constraints, limitations, and fears can set ceilings or barriers. when perhaps a perceived ceiling is only the floor of the next level. leveling up my thinking allows me to see from a higher vantage point - inclination to my gaze. endings may just be new beginnings. i can set my eyes and focus on what was lost or being left. alternatively, i can set my eyes on the new path ahead. letting the new backfill the finished.
letting the next stand on the foundation of the previous.
so, is there another way to look at this?
what i’ve set my eyes to thus far have brought my drift to where i am now. for new journeys, destinations, and invitations - the gaze likely needs to pivot. i don’t run looking at where my feet are now but where they will be in a few steps. too far or too close and i’ll likely trip and fall. setting my gaze matters. and continually recalibrating for onward, forward progress.
my gaze determines my aim.
my aim determines my direction.
then my interpretation of what is seen determines my movement towards or away.
where i set my gaze, there i will go.
where i set my limits, there they will be.
gazing.
beholding is being held.
becoming what you’re beholding.
gaze into a gaze.
the eyes are a window,
door to the inner,
threshold to the outer.
set the sights,
take aim,
compelled on, while letting in.
relenting and proceeding calibrated by a gaze.
seek, yearn, long, look,
towards me, towards you.
gazed.
“what the eye sees more deeply, the heart tends to love more tenderly.” - Robert Kegan
more?
[reading]
Beholding, Strahan Coleman
[scripture]
matt 7
isaiah 55:8,9
luke 11:34
eph 1:18